Great Find (?)

i have this weird habit of "googling" my name. wala lang just for fun. i did so just a few hours ago and my was i surprised!!! nakita ko yung old website na pinupuntahan ko para magblog (of course the URL would remain secret until further notice)...astig!!! well sort of..kasi nakita ko 'tong entry na 'to. Post date is June 13...2005 oh di ba hanep sa katandaan! almost 3 years...natatawa nga ako habang binabasa ko yung mga pinagsasabi ko 'dun. hay, young puppy love talaga..anyways, tapos na 'yun, nakapagmove on na ang lahat kaya siguro okay lang i-post siya dito. Plus, it's a barell of laughs not just for me but for those who knew me and the girl. Dun naman sa girl (at sa boyfriend niya) no hard feelings ha? okay namang tayong tatlo di ba? at masaya ako para sa inyong dalawa...

enjoy...
One Cloudy Afternoon
"She's already taken

She's already taken
She's already taken me..."


Again in the immortal words of an uncorrupted OPM band i find myself contemplating in a verse...


The day i have been afraid of has finally come...mala judgment day ang dating....hehe forgive me if it sounds melodramatic pero that would be the understatement of the century


i just found out that my nightmarish thoughts have finally been a figment of reality....


Put*** in* SINAGOT NA NYA!!!

hehe actually i found out late...mga 3 days after it became formal and all....pero actually i was one of the few people who knew...masyado ata silang secretive... i guess pag nalaman ng block, marami ang may violent reactions


pero ano naman ang magagawa ko or ng block for that matter...wala di ba??? sila naman ang involved eh...ah basta i guess hindi pa rin ang-sisink in sa kin ang mga nangyayari...how could she???? hindi ko man lang nalaman sa kanya, sa iba pa..."akala ko ba semi-kinda best bud na guy" ako sa kanya...eh bakit parang after nung "nangyari" sa min umiiwas na sya...tapos sabi pa ng kada nya "ako" daw ang umiiwas...ang gulo talaga!!!!
basta hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko...words cannot express how much disappointment i am feeling right now.... disappointed sa sarili ko dahil sinayang ko ang pagkakaibigan namin... disappointed sa kanya dahil hindi nya makita kung gano ko sya kamahal... disappointed sa aming dalawa kasi ni hindi na kami nagpapansinan....
i found out last Saturday (June 11 2005...one cloudy afternoon after Pharm110 Lec...sinabi sa kin ng isang friend ko...tapos she asked "so anong reaction mo???" sabi ko na lang "ako??? wala...ano naman ang sasabihin ko?..." after that she dropped the subject..thinking that i was too affected...ako din halos hindi ako makapaniwala sa narinig ko..."
"SILA NA...."
when i got home..that's when it hit me...f**k sila na...sinagot na nya...all of my defenses crumbled...lahat ng memories ko with her nagflashback...that dance...the text messages...her jokes...her smile...our conversations...lahat nag-flashback...that's when i realized that those memories won't happen again....i didn't even realized that i was crying already...
wala na ang bestfriend ko....wala na...wala na ang kaisa-isang taong minahal ko...
tapos naalala ko yung times na niligawan ko sya..yung time na sinabi ko na kung ano talaga ang nararamdaman ko sa kanya...ang sarap balik-balikan.
yung time na binigyan ko sya ng susi..yung time na binigyan nya ko ng chocolate bisquit..nung PharmcheM 26 Lab nya....hanggang dun sa text message nya saying "i hope you love me enough just to let me go..."
lahat talaga nag-recap in just a matter of minutes
hindi ko talaga lubos maisip kung anong nakita nya dun sa lalaking yun (kung lalaki nga sya)..alam naman ng lahat na wala talagang kwentang tao yun...pero sabi nga nya "mas kilig" nga daw sya dun kesa akin...
wala na...hanggang ilusyon na lang talaga ko....
so ano ng gagawin ko???
maghintay....
matulog....
"sa panaginip na lang pala kita maisasayaw...."


(back to reality)

hahahaha....ang pathetic talaga